A Frothy Fiasco: A Cozy Mystery (Sweet Home Mystery Series Book 3) Read online

  “You know,” Eli said, chomping down on a cheese stick, “I’ll bet that between what the five of us know, we could figure out this whole theft thing right now.”

  “There are six of us,” Dad said, feeling a little left out.

  “”Well, since you haven’t been around for all the fun, I figured you wouldn’t have a lot to contribute, Frank. I didn’t mean to leave you out.”

  “Well, you never know. But I guess you probably don’t have a pharmaceutical or medical aspect to a string of thefts, so I’ll just listen. It sounds like a fascinating story.”

  “Well, maybe we do.” I looked at Eli.

  “Frank,” he said, now very interested in his knowledge, “what do you know about Lycopodium?”

  “Lycopodium? You don’t see it much anymore. It’s a moss. People take capsules of it for anxiety. The powder can be used for a deodorant for your body or feet, and even for rashes to help dry up the skin, like a talc. Sometimes doctors would rub it on their hands to make it easier to slide into gloves. In fact, we used to mix it with a little patchouli for its antibacterial effect and dust the surgical gloves with it so they wouldn’t stick together in the box. We stopped using it because some report said it might have toxic effects. Now we’ve improved the formula for the latex and neoprene so it’s unnecessary, or we just use cornstarch. I think a couple of companies might still use Lyco, though.”

  “Can it cause anaphylaxis? Can latex?” Eli was close to something.

  “Well, in rare cases, but it would have to be ingested or inhaled. Maybe an open wound or the eyes could get enough of the histamine to trigger a reaction like that.

  Eli’s mind was a million miles away, adding this information to the facts he already knew. I thought about the gloves in Tony’s pocket, but he was at the Coffee Cabana when Mrs. Portswain was robbed and killed, and Eli said there was powder there on the scene.

  Jules and I looked at each other, and at the same moment our eyes grew wide and we gave each other a knowing smile.

  “I know who’s behind all of the robberies,” I said.

  “And who killed Mrs. Portswain,” Jules added.

  Jules and I took turns telling the story, weaving the details together seamlessly. When I took a bite, she would pick up where I left off, and when she was eating I was talking. The others hardly said a word, and if we saw a puzzled expression on someone’s face, we threw in the detail to help them understand.

  Our steaks disappeared quickly (shrimp, in the case of Essie and Hildie), and we left Jake’s full and satisfied. Now we just needed to set the final trap that would prove our theory.

  Chapter Fourteen

  These early morning coffee sales were a godsend, but I was going to have to ask Essie and Hildie to pick up one or two of the early shifts for me every week. Getting up at 5:00 am was killing me, but going to bed by 10:00 was really cramping my style. I would have liked to spend another hour with Eli after dinner last night.

  By the time Essie and Hildie got here at 9:00 a.m., I was already done with a pot of coffee and well into my day. I went next door to see how Jules was doing, but she hadn’t come in yet. It was very unusual for her not to be in by 8 o’clock, especially with her hoping to get out the first issue of her newspaper tomorrow afternoon.

  “Tony! I just texted you ten minutes ago, and here you are.”

  “Well, I was close by. Essie, can you pour me a cup of your coffee please? Haven’t had my caffeine fix yet.”

  “Sure thing, Tony.”

  “Well,” I said, “nothing’s broken, but my coffee order won’t come until late tomorrow, and with the busy weekend with the festival and the extra sales with the cool mornings, I was just wondering if I could get an extra case from you, and maybe some cream and artificial sweetener too.”

  “Will after lunch be okay? I’ve got to run to the warehouse now for a few things anyway, and I can pick some more up. I guess a lot of places were running low after this busy weekend. I’m all out right now.”

  “That would be perfect,” I said. “Essie, I’m going to run this deposit to the bank, and I think I’ll stop at Jules’ on the way and bring her a cup of tea and a muffin. You coffee is on the house, Tony. Thanks so much.”

  As usual, Jules’ front door was unlocked. She didn’t answer my knock. There was no way I was going to leave my deposit in the car with all the thefts, so I put the deposit envelope under my arm that was holding the tea and muffin bag and turned the knob to go inside.

  “Yoohoo! Jules! It’s the tea fairy…where are you?”

  Then my heart stopped. There on the sofa lay Jules, one foot on the floor and her arm hanging limply over the edge. Her head was facing the back of the couch, and her laptop was on the floor beside her.

  “Jules!” I shrieked. “Oh my God!”

  I ran to her as I put everything down hastily as I reached for my phone in my pocket.

  “Geez, you don’t have to scream, Lily. You’re going to give a girl a heart attack.” She pushed herself up with both hands and sat up on the sofa, taking a deep morning breath and planting her chin groggily in her hands.

  My heart was beating rapidly now, and my arteries were filled with the rush of adrenaline. I gave her a big hug. “Jules…thank God.”

  “I love you too, Lily…but what the heck?”

  “Just a little on edge, probably from all the crime drama. I guess I freaked out a little when I saw you lying dead on the couch. I brought you some tea and a muffin.” It was a miracle I hadn’t spilled a drop.

  Jules looked up with a weird smile. “Sorry. I stayed up late writing the lead story for the paper. I guess I must have crashed and burned sometime around sunrise.”

  “Is it done? ”

  “Yup. Just need to proofread and edit it.”

  “So let’s invite people in to the Coffee Cabana, maybe about 6:00, and you can read it too them.”

  “Then nobody will buy a paper if they already know.”

  “They’ll have to buy a paper to get in.”

  “Hmm. But they won’t get it until they leave. Maybe Hank can run off a few dozen early editions by 7:00. So, what do you think of: Gazette and Cabana Solve Sweet Home Thefts and Portswain Murder?”

  “Maybe alphabetical order. Cabana and Gazette.”

  “I’ve got a better idea. Maybe I’ll just lead with: Lilly Parker Eats Two Steaks in Three Days; Gains Three Pounds.”

  “Okay, Jules. Have it your way.” I knew Jules was teasing and, for that matter, so was I. “Need any help getting things set up?”

  “Nope.”

  “K. Gotta run, then. Glad you’re not dead!”

  “See you in an hour!”

  Tony came back in about 1:30 with a case of coffee and two small boxes of condiments. “Are you sure one’s enough?”

  “Always the salesman,” I teased.

  He set the boxes on the counter. “No. Just want to make sure you don’t run out, Lily.”

  “That’s right. You’re one of the good guys. I almost forgot.” Tony really did seem to have a good heart.

  “Lily,” Hildie said, coming out from the back room, “do you have that deposit receipt from this morning? I need to put it in the ledger.”

  I was reaching for my purse under the counter, but then I stopped short. “Oh, drat. I dropped it on the floor next to the sofa at Jules’, and forgot to pick it up. Then I forgot to go to the bank! I’m getting old.”

  “Well, maybe Jules saw it and brought it in with her.”

  “Are you guys talking about me?” Jules had a way of sneaking in the back door without any of us hearing her come in.

  “Jules, did you see my deposit zipper envelope on the floor by your sofa? I dropped it on the floor when I stopped by earlier.”

  “Nope. But I’ll be stopping by there at 3:00 sharp to feed the cat. I can grab it and get it to the bank before 3:30 if you’d like. Where is it?”

  “You’re a savior, Jules. It’s right by the end of your sofa where I set your te
a and muffin down. Just be sure it’s in the bank by 3:30. It’s got all the cash from yesterday and this morning. Nearly a thousand dollars.”

  “Consider it done. Will that get me a free cup of tea to get me through the afternoon?”

  “Please, Jules. My tea is your tea. Of course…I will get free newspapers, won’t I?”

  “Sure, as long as I can put a stack here on your counter to sell.”

  “Deal.”

  Tony was just finishing up a text on his phone. “Do you mind if I kill a little time here? I have to service an ice machine in Sabina at 4:00, and the coffee is a lot better here than at the diner down the street.”

  “Sure. I could use the company. So, Tony, is that your last job of the day, in Sabina?”

  “Ya, but Patti is on the night shift at Sleepy Palms activity center today, so I’ll probably stop in there when she gets in at 6:00 to take her order for coffee. They use those pods that let you brew one cup at a time. That way the residents can have coffee any time, but you don’t waste any by brewing too much.”

  “Yeah, I’ve never cared for those myself.”

  “They’re pretty good, but nothing beats fresh brewed.”

  “Say, why don’t you stop in when you’re done with Patti? Jules will have some time then, and maybe we can talk about that ice machine. I’d really like to get her input.”

  Tony’s eyes lit up. ‘Now you’re talking like a successful coffee shop owner. Say about 6:15? 6:20?”

  “That would be perfect.”

  It was almost 6 o’clock, and the Coffee Cabana was filled to capacity. Word of mouth had spread, and the curious townsfolk continued to file in. All of the tables were filled, and people were standing along the walls and front windows. Essie and I were making sure that everyone had the opportunity to buy a hot cup of coffee or a cold frappe or smoothie. Hildie and Jules were behind the counter filling the orders.

  Eli walked out from the backroom and whispered something in Jules’ ear. Then she picked up her manuscript and stood in front of the large crowd. The place quickly went silent, and she began to read:

  A rash of thefts that has plagued Sweet Home for more than a week has finally been solved. The local and visiting children, as well as a well-respected local handyman, who were among the early suspects, have been completely exonerated.

  Toe smiled, and he and Harvey gave each other a nod. Mike Barton patted his son’s shoulder.

  It all began the Saturday before last when Gazette editor, Jules Ledger‘s, ring was stolen from the back room of the Coffee Cabana. When she later found it at her home, it was determined that it had in fact been returned by the soft-hearted thief, who also returned the checks from Marcus Jackson’s deposit, though the thief kept the cash. Since it would be too risky to cash the checks and a shame to throw them away, the thief with a conscience returned them.

  The crowd was getting impatient.

  “Who did it?” shouted Martha White.

  “Yeah,” seconded Jerry Thatcher.

  “I’d sure like to know who did it too,” said Toe.

  There were calls from all over the crowded house to name the thief, and the demands were getting louder.

  It looked like Essie was going to give the crowd a piece of her mind, so I decided to speak up first.

  “Okay,” I said. “Just settle down.”

  Tony opened the front door, stopping in his tracks and looking a little curious about the big crowd, so I waved him in.

  “Come on in, Tony.”

  He made his way to the front and sat on the stool at the counter next to Eli.

  “Yeah, tell us who it was,” said Tommy Jenkins.

  “What’s going on here, Lily?” Tony asked.

  “You’re just in time. We’re going to tell everybody who the thief is that’s been stealing everybody’s stuff. Okay, folks, do you want to know who did it?”

  Tony looked to one side and then the other and started to get up to leave. “I don’t have time to wait to talk about that ice machine with you.”

  “Not so fast.” Eli grabbed Tony’s wrist and slapped a handcuff around it. Then he looped the open cuff around one of the uprights on the back of the stool and cuffed his other wrist.

  Jules took over. “It turns out that Mr. Georgetti, the coffee machine salesman is the man responsible.”

  There was a murmur in the crowd. Some heads were nodding and others were shaking. Most of them knew Tony, and everybody liked him.

  “Don’t be silly, Julianna,” Harvey said getting halfway to his feet. He was right here with us during some of the robberies.”

  “Well,” I said standing next to Jules now for what was likely to be a news conference with a lot of Q&A, “he didn’t do all of the robberies. Not by himself anyway. But he did a lot. Like Essie’s jewelry. He heard her talking about the jewels Joe, her late husband had given her, but he didn’t know they were in safekeeping. So he went there and broke the back door window and reached through to open the doorknob with his rubber gloves on…”

  I reached into Tony’s back pocket, and sure enough his gloves were still there.

  “Electrovalent charges in your skin, my eye,” I said just loudly enough for Tony to hear as I pulled them out. Then I shook them in front of the crowd, creating a cloud of white dust. “…leaving traces of this Lycopodium powder on the knob and the jewelry boxes.”

  “And when he heard the ladies coming home ahead of schedule,” Jules continued, “he wanted to leave your calling card, Toe. He was in a hurry, so he just tossed your pen into the living room on his way to the kitchen, and it landed by the paint can.”

  “But how did he get my pen? I never gave him one.”

  “That’s easy, Toe. Remember when you went to write Essie’s paint job on your calendar and your pen was missing?”

  “Well, ya.”

  “Just a minute before that when Tony was leaving to rob Essie, he put his hand on your shoulder and whispered something in your ear.”

  “Ya, he said he thought…” Toe looked at Essie. “…he thought somebody was sweet on me.”

  That got a few chuckles from the crowd and an eye roll from Essie.

  “And he palmed your pen at the same time. His prints were on it, so he had to wipe it clean.”

  Toe gave Tony an angry look. “So you’re the one who’s been trying to frame me this whole time.”

  “And he was here when I told Lily where my spare key was,” Jules said, “so he used it to get into my house when he knew I was at work and returned my ring. I guess he felt bad when he saw how much it hurt me. But when Lily finally told me she didn’t return it, I knew something was up. I never just laid my ring on the counter. I always put it in a cup so I couldn’t knock it down the drain. And, since my spare key doesn’t get used very often, guess whose fingerprints were still on it when Eli tested it yesterday?”

  Moira raised her hand to answer, but Carmen whispered in her ear, presumably explaining rhetorical questions to her.

  Penny Carver raised her hand for a different reason. “What about Helen Portswain? She was robbed the same day as Essie, and she ended up dead.”

  “I didn’t do that!” Tony protested. “I would never hurt anybody. Besides, I was right here at the coffee shop when that happened. So you see, that messes up your whole theory. I’m innocent. How could I be in two places at one time?”

  “It’s easy, when you have a partner,” I said. “Karen…” I called over my shoulder to the back room.

  Officer Crenshaw came out with a short black-haired woman in handcuffs. “Meet Cynthia Rollins. We caught her using Jules’ spare key to open her front door a few hours ago. I just happened to be inside waiting for her.” Karen looked pleased, but serious.

  “That’s the girl I saw the day Harvey’s thingamajig disappeared at the gas station!” Toe said excitedly.

  “I’ve never seen this woman before in my life,” Tony insisted.

  “That’s right, Toe. She’s the girl with the motorcycle. And
the man you saw her with was Tony.”

  “Oh, no, it wasn’t Tony. That guy had a ponytail and a moustache.”

  “Like this?” I reached over the counter and grabbed the cap I had bought at Hog Heaven off the top shelf and put it on Tony’s head.

  “Well, I’ll be,” said Toe. “It looked just like that. Same hat; same light brown ponytail.”

  “That doesn’t prove it was me wearing it. It could have been anybody,” Tony said, but he was beginning to feel trapped.

  “Well, I pulled a hair identical to these off your shirt a few days ago. Oh…and that shiny new Ice King machine at Hog Heaven got me thinking, so I called this morning. It turns out you were installing it when the ponytail hats arrived. That was the same day that Schooner’s mp3 player went missing too. So many coincidences, huh? But she’s the one who robbed Mrs. Portswain.”

  “I didn’t kill anybody,” the woman said defiantly.

  “You didn’t intend to,” I said.

  Eli picked it up from there. “But, unfortunately, Mrs. Portswain had a liver transplant several years ago, and she has to take anti-rejection drugs. That suppresses her immune system, and with her age and allergies, that would become fatal. She surprised you by coming into her apartment while you were burglarizing her unit, and to keep her from screaming you put your hand over mouth and nose. That was enough for the powder and the latex in the glove to send her into anaphylactic shock and stop her weak heart. Unfortunately for you, causing someone’s death in the course of committing a felony is a little thing we call felony murder.”

  “You have no proof it was me.”

  Karen Crenshaw handed Eli a list of items that had been found in her motorcycle saddlebag.

  “I would be willing to wager that one of the pawn tickets found on your motorcycle will lead us to Mrs. Portswain’s tiara. Shall we bet, say, a hundred dollars?”

  She just glared at him with disgust.

  Mr. Jackson from the hardware store stood up. “And I’ll bet she was the one that stole my deposit too. I would have seen that tall man in my store, but she’s shorter than the rows of shelves, so she could have been in the aisles and I would have never seen her. I’ll bet her fingerprints are on those burglar tools she was going to buy too.”